There was a young lad named Diddy Da Roo
Who in his day had seen a birthday or two
He claimed to be part of a royal clan
Said he got more presents than any man
There was game cubes and shoes and even a pony
In the back of my mind I thought he was a phoney
But then one [...]

Diddy I have a question that’s making me crazy
Some things in my mind are really quite hazy
This thing that said has put my mind to a chore
About tickling other men and what happens before??
You look at them and say
Look at those crazy guys
Then you look at them some more and say
I can tell by their [...]

I’ve heard it once.. I’ve heard it twice
I’ve heard it a thousands times more
That Diddy will soon fly
To watch his favorite man whore
It happens in the morning
and it happens at night
Every time I turn around
I see the same site
A text window of Diddy
Saying something obscure
That always ends up
with the same letters four
TOOL
TOOL
TOOL
is what he says
TOOL
TOOL
TOOL
IS [...]

Now some of you think that Easter is sweet
With chocolate and bunnies with great big feet
But let me tell you there are others who see
A day with different possiblities
Men dress in suits all covered with fur
and tails that bounce and cause quite a stir
When the eggs are all found and the peeps have been ate
It’s [...]

I would like to take a break from poems to study this agenda that Diddy has put forth for a Saturday. At quick glance you can see how he is torn between his manly instincts and his need to be more like a woman. See List Below:
Step 1. Eat breakfast
Step 2. Go to [...]

It’s true you see that unlike me
Diddy is aroused by Maynard James Keenan
We’ve had many talks yes, many debates
But I think Diddy would still like with Maynard to mate.
Pictures on his wall and pictures in his shower
He thinks of Maynard almost every hour
He sits and stares and fondles his member
For Maynard is his lifes biggest [...]

Diddy oh Diddy
Now where can you be?
Diddy oh Diddy
Why are you ignoring me?
Diddy Oh Diddy
Your window is dead!
Diddy oh Diddy
Did you go back to bed?
Diddy I know that you’re quite fond of yellow
A very strange thing for a late 30s fellow
Your cars and your bikes and your shirts and your shoes
All look so cheerful in [...]